Young women gazing out a window.

How to Conquer Yourself

“One who conquers others is great, one who conquers the world is mighty, but one who conquers himself is divine.”

Matshona Dhliwayo

Changing the world first begins with changing ourselves. An honest look in the mirror helps to maintain humility and grace. The process of conquering our own demons will grant us the understanding and compassion needed to deal with other people’s imperfections.

Twelve Ways to Conquer Yourself

  1. Let go of what others think about you. Be sure to identify whether all of your thoughts, beliefs, and opinions about yourself are actually yours versus someone else’s.
  2. Know thyself. Write a list of your strengths and weaknesses to help maintain self-awareness. Focus on developing your strengths.
  3. Master your mind. Control your thoughts so that they do not control you. Your mind is there to serve you.
  4. Keep your promises to yourself. Keeping your promises to yourself and others helps to build self-trust.
  5. Never compromise your self-respect; it is too high a price to pay. We cannot truly respect ourselves if we do not respect others.
  6. Identify any beliefs, barriers, or negative self-talk that are draining your energy instead of empowering you to reach your highest potential. Reframe negatives into positives.
  7. Name your fears; a fear must be named to be weakened. Explore any fears or insecurities that may be holding you back from seeking the life you want.
  8. Let go of past mistakes once you have learned the lesson. Guilt is a healthy emotion that acts as an internal radar to warn us when we have gone against our values, however, once the lesson is learned, guilt no longer serves a purpose. If we do not let the guilt go it can turn into shame which is toxic.
  9. Change any negative habits or addictions that are destructive to your well-being. Seek professional help when required.
  10. Know what you want from life. We can’t get what we want from life if we do not know what it is. It is important to identify your goals and create an action plan to make it happen. People tend to step out of the way for those who know where they are going.
  11. Do not take yourself too seriously. It is healthier to be grounded in a unity consciousness than in ego. If we have no ego, there is nothing to get bruised.
  12. Challenge your limits. “If it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you.” – Fred DeVito

Everything can be Taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms―to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”

Viktor E. Frankl

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